How often do you take on others problems and try to help them solve them? So often we take on the toils of others out of pure love to ensure they are safe and out of harm. When you work in an industry where helping people is your main trade you tend to bring this into your personal life too. Part of the hardest thing about being in industries where helping other is your key focus is where do your create that boundary. People are drawn to you because you are a helper, you are nice but then tend to drop you as soon as you are unnecessary. As humans its a natural instinct to be wanted to be needed. We like the idea that someone wants us or needs us. Especially as females we are providers, that what we are created for, to create little humans and provide for them. What I tend to find is I get too emotionally involved in those I care about, I feel their pain when things go wrong, I want to carry and nurture them to make sure they are pain free, but what you have to remember is everyone has to carry their own backpack. One of my friends pulled me aside the other day. With a lot of change happening in my life right now, it causes major unsettlement with emotions which causes you to over worry, over think and over emotionalise everything. She told me this story about your own backpack. Everyone has their own life backpack they have to carry. Everyones each individual backpack is pretty heavy, its full of everything in your life, your worries, your fears, your emotions, your trophies, your winnings, your dreams – everything. Everybody has one of these backpacks and everyones backpack is pretty darn full. You can’t unload someone else backpack onto yours, because how will you then be able to climb the hill? All you can do is hold their hand, support them, and encourage them to the top. SO here is my weekly motivation for you. If you are trying to help someone else unload their backpack. STOP. Support, cry with them, hold their Hand, encourage them BUT you cannot take on their backpack as well as your own. What I suggest for you this week is to support. If you can feel someone struggling, reach out. Ask them if they are okay, let them know you are there to support. Let them know that we can all talk about our backpacks, and we can all support each other. But remember you have enough in your backpack alone. You need to focus on that.
Yes… ME! Learning to let the waves come to me and not chase them! Meaning I need to learn to be patient… and learn to stop time incase I miss things. Life is so precious and we spend so much time chasing things… Career Success, Love, Money, Glory, Image, Perfection – how often do you take time to just be in the moment? How often have you been impatient and its caused things to break down, or you have missed a vital piece of information, or been misinformed because you haven’t waited for the whole picture before jumping to conclusions? How often have you wanted the answers NOW and not waited for them to find you? Yes I am guilty of all the above. Of putting career before relationships. Of chasing perfection rather than embracing what I have. For fearing hurt/abandonment and jumping to conclusions in relationships. None of us are perfect but what we can is recognise these things. Take time to just watch the waves.
Take time to allow the waves to come to you, see the full picture, understand the process. Work on what you love while you do it… learn to embrace you and your time. Be alone in your head and it not be scary. Embrace your space, laugh with your friends, worry less live more! Work hard but remember that you need to play too. Be brave enough to be vulnerable, be brave to trust what your gut is saying without jeopardising your worth. Be brave to say you are worth the wait to achieve great things, but you have to go through process. There is no short cuts, so stop chasing the waves. They eventually reach the shore in a calm, beautiful manor!
So for now… laugh in the confusion, embrace the moments, live your life, but still visualise your dreams. Be patient in the process and dance your way to happiness, all in the knowing that the waves will eventually reach the shore, in the right time, in the right moment exactly the way it was meant to be.
So fashion – let’s talk about it. It is featured in our day to day lives. It is how we express ourselves, how we feel, how we portray who we are. Fashion can create first impressions and can be very defining for you. I remember when I first worked in an office and I put on my suit to go to work… the moment walking down the street I felt empowered, strong and successful. The same as what you wear in terms of how it shapes you and how you dress yourself. The best thing about fashion and beauty is that it is your way to express your personality but this scares people. They hide away and don’t express themselves because they don’t want to stand out. Part of “beyoutiful u” is trying to work with YOU to enable you to dress beyoutifully U according to your personality, your body shape, your skin tone and how you want to be viewed. I am going to be interviewing experts in the industry on what their hints and tips would be for you in terms of outfit choices, colours and shapes to suit who you are and what impression you are going to give. Here are some of my choices from the past month:
My Favourite: Networking Event
At a networking event you want to give the right impression. You need to decide what statement you are trying to make and what you want out of the event. For a recent networking event I wore this strong and bold jumpsuit. This jumpsuits highlights my curves in all the right places and it is a statement print meaning – I mean business and want to stand out. I know that monotone suits my skin tone and I brightened up the outfit with red lippy. POWER COLOUR.
Saturdays are all about looking fresh, having fun and being fashionable for me. This summer has been all about the sparkly trainers. I LOVE them. I am sad that this is coming to an end. But I love on weekends to look fresh, make a statement but still seem casual. I like to make sure that I am like: Hey I love fashion but today I am just chilling.
When you wear a statement dress and colour you are saying Hello World I am here. When I am feeling really strong and powerful in my mind, body and soul I like to step it up and be bold. Alot of people are afraid of being bold because they don’t know what people would say. I wouldn’t of dreamed of wearing ANYTHING this bold 4/5 years ago as I wanted to hide away. As I have worked on my mind and sould I have felt more and more confident expressing how I feel through clothes. You can too!!
Find your way to fashion freedom with my book: Free-ed: Stop Self Sabotage and start living your life again. OUT October 16th 2017. GET IT ON AMAZON NOW