Attitudes? What are they? What do they represent? Why do we have them? Have you ever heard of the saying,” if you don’t like something change it, if you can’t change it change your attitude”. I spoke briefly about attitudes on Monday on my live insta feed and how we can identify our attitudes and how we can change them… but I want to go into a little more depth. I want to help YOU change your mind and your life. I want to help inspire you, motivate and educate you to realise and understand that you have the power to do whatever you set your mind too. All it takes is a change in attitude. An attitude is what we think, what we do and how we feel. this can be in regards to a situation, a person, or a hobbie, or anything that makes you think, do or feel. FOR example: some people have a bad attitude towards relationships, this is normally learnt from experience of a bad relationship and having negative connotations towards any relaltionship they step into, they automatically expect the next relationship to be the same… why? Because most people end relationships, don’ t spend the time to reflect and understand why it didn’t work, before quickly moving onto the next situation… with the same attitude… and the cycle continues. One bad experience, after another, and another and another leads too: negative outcome, negative attitude. In order to change your attitudes – we need to change our behaviours – which means we need to look at our current situation and what our desired situation would be – this is called ecology checking (looking at our behavioural impact on our attitudes).
How do we change our behaviours?
You have come to this point right now – even I am assuming from those reading where you just think: I wan’t more than this. I deserve more than this. Why am I not getting more than this? One of my favouritie universal Authors Dr Steve DeMartini talks about your thoughts become things – what you think about you bring about. Therefore same is with behaviours we need to start looking at how we act is what we attract into our lives. First thing I want you to do is think about the behaviours you portray? What behaviours do you like? What behaviours do you not like so much? What behaviours do YOU want to change to be the person YOU want to portray?
For example: Jayne August 2016
What behaviours did I portray?
- Low Confidence in my ideas
- Low body esteem
- My attitude towards myself was that I wasn’t good enough
- My behaviours were I was afraid that everyone around me hated me
- I actually 14 months ago sent an urgent email to MIND.org as I was in a mental place again where I didn’t want to be here. I had lost my focus, my goals, what I wanted to do with life, trapped, alone, and misunderstood – VERY misunderstood. I felt like everyone around me would be better off without me there and I was just an annoyance to peoples lives, I had started to allow others behaviours to affect me. UNTIL I took a step back and thought… why are you doing this to yourself again?
I picked up a book the Slight Edge and honestly started to revolutionise my life. I have so many people contacting me, commenting on my positivity, change in mindset and outlook. I took a step back and literally went into a social recluse. I removed myself entirely because I knew I had to reinvent myself. I dived fully into work, self development and writing my book, because I knew I wasn’t getting the best out of myself. These behaviours and attitudes didn’t change overnight. They took months of persistence, determination and focus. I started with my focus being part of the “5am Club” which Robin Sharma talks about loads. I then started reading every day – every morning for the first 30 minutes of my day I would do learning. It focused my mind and made me alert for the day ahead. From here I stayed focused on what worked best for me. Social situations I would take part if they worked best for me, because I had got myself into the habit of completely forgetting about my goals, my wants, my needs and put everyone else first. But unless you are looking after number 1 how can you support others? I took a big step forward and day by day I started to feel myself grow. Spritually, emotionally, stance and becoming the woman I wanted to become. I desired so badly to be this radiant positive person who could help others believe in themselves and help make an impact to positively improve the world. (I am still working on this) but my mission is to look after number 1 and use how I deal with my imperfections to help change peoples outlook – I am a coach, a speaker and a people person. What I have done for the last 10 years is help develop and manage people to change their perspective and outlook on fitness and their priorities. I had all my basis there, I just wasnt implementing it. So lets look at some NLP: Neuro Linguistic Programming – How we are going to change your behavioural competencies. Lets start with future pacing today. Your mental rehersal of what you could achieve and what you want to achieve (what you think about you bring about).
What is your desired outcome?
What do you want? What would you like to happen?
What values do you associate to this outcome?
What is important about it to you? How will it benefit you?
What evidence will you need to know that you have achieved this outcome?
How will you know when you’ve got it? How will others know? What will you and others see?
What’s your current responsibilities to achieve and your barriers?
what has stopped you so far from achieving your outcome? What will you have to do differently?
What will your ecology check and positive intervention come of it?
What impact will this outcome have on your life? Work? People around you?
Are you sure you want it?
Are there any positive by products by staying the way you are now?
Take a moment to float off 5 years in to the future and look back from then. What was the first steps you needed to take towards acheiving your desired outcome?
Take 15 – 20 minutes to complete this exercise – Email me your results and ideas: