Happy Mind: A- Zen of Life

2016-02-10-1455067088-5968649-MayurGalaviaUnsplash.jpgAfter taking a weekend to relfect on life and chill – everyone needs to do it every so often. I came across this amazing post on facebook. The A – Zen of life by Dalai Lama.

LIVE ONE DAY AT A TIME and make it a masterpiece

A void negative sources, people, places & habits
B elieve in yourself
C onsider things from every angle
D on’t give up and don’t give in
E verything you’re looking for lies behind the mask you wear
F amily & friends are hidden treasures, seek them & enjoy their riches
G ive more than you planned to
H ang on to your dreams
I f opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door
J udge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it
K eep trying no matter how hard it seems
L ove yourself
M ake it happen
N ever lie, cheat or steal
O pen your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values
P ractice makes perfect
Q uality not quantity in anything you do
R emember that silence is sometimes the best answer
S top procrastinating
T ake control of your own destiny
U nderstand yourself in order to better understand others
V isualize it
W hen you lose, don’t lose the lesson
X cellence in all your efforts
Y ou are unique nothing can replace you
Z ero in on your target & go for it

I just read through it and thought WOW, this is all so true! I want you to go into this week feeling positive and happy with life. We are into the final stretch of 2016. How has this year been for you? I want you to answer these questions:

  • What have you learnt in 2016?
  • How are you going to use everything from 2016 to make 2017 incredible?
  • How are you going to make December incredible?
  • What lessons have your learnt this year that you won’t allow to happen next year?
  • What are your highlights from 2016?

Go out and have an incredible week! x

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Finding Freedom: The Truth

When people talk about eating disorders and body dimorphic, if you don’t understand it, or haven’t been through the extremities your natural reaction would be,

“Why Can’t They Just Sort Themselves Out”

Trust me – you question yourself that numerous times – why can’t I just get rid of this? Why does this need to consume me? My parents would question themselves? Friends wondering why you put yourself through it? Everyone in your closer network is affected. But I am here to help and say it is okay, you can do this, and you will ALL live happier lives!

More the 1.6 million are directly affected with eating disorders yearly, and did you know that out of all psychiatric disorders – Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate? Probably not, as this illness has been the unspoken sin, the illness that no one realises how serious it is, or how much it can affect your life. It isn’t just someone who won’t eat, or binge eats, or manipulates their diets. It is a whole plethora of mental problems that affect this person entirety  in mind, body and soul.

“The Health and Care Information Centre published figures in February 2014 showed an 8% rise in the number of inpatient hospital admissions in the 12 months previous to October 2013. The Costs of Eating Disorders report found that this is indicative of the trend in increasing prevalence over time: a 34% increase in admissions since 2005-06 – approximately 7% each year. ” (www.b-eat.co.uk)

With issues and costs on the rise, something needs to be done to help reduce these issues.

Luckily I am one of the survivors, but some others are not that lucky.

Why is this?
It could be numerous things – I just knew that I wanted and I deserved a better life than what I was giving myself, and I was determined to beat it to enable myself to fulfil happiness and others around me because I was pulling them down!

“Research suggests that around 46% of anorexia patients fully recover, a 33% improving and 20% remaining chronically ill. Similar research into bulimia suggests that 45% make a full recovery, 27% improve considerably and 23% suffer chronically.” (www.b-eat.co.uk

Wouldn’t it be amazing to turn around in 5 years time and say 60% make a full recovery? No longer will 20% die prematurely from this illness because more people will be able to approach and get help earlier? It isn’t just the complications that you have when you are in the depths of illness, it’s any complications you may have after and long term – like teeth corrosion, brittle bones, ulcers in your stomach, hiatus hernia in your oesophagus, stomach lining damage – we could go on but here is a glimpse and short story on my recovery.

Short Picture Story of My Journey from Admitting to Full Recovery
My recovery time from admission – 5 years!

 

My story is only one of a few that have fully recovered and made a new life for themselves. In pictures you can see the changes in my body throughout each phase. My story will be published next year in my book: Free’ed.

I now live a happy, confident and life that I want to help others realise how amazing they are and that they can make something of their lives – no matter what illness they are facing, life troubles or low they have got.
You have got the strength to pull through and you can do it!

On December 18th I am chucking myself out of a plane from 10,000ft to help raise awareness of the amount of support there is out there to help sufferers of Eating Disorders, but not just ED, any illness that consumes your life – you have the power to bring yourself back to a point that you realise your worth again.

Please support me:
https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/Jayne-Nisbet-111

And help me provide help from other sufferers out there who are struggling to find their inner strength.

“Standing there, on my home turf, in front of my home crowd. Feeling strong, powerful and ready. That’s when I heard the crowd roar – and that was the moment I knew… I had made it – I was free’ed”.  Jayne Nisbet (CWG 2014)

Erradicate Self Doubt: Female Empowerment

I read an article recently talking about the difference between males and females in their confidence of knowing their value and self worth. It shocked me really… but it really hit a nail on the head – too many females out there don’t believe they are good enough! WHY? Jumpup.jpgBecause for tens of thousand of years, men have always been the leaders, women haven’t had as many rights, women have been believed to be home bearers, stay being only mothers… but in this past decade everyone is starting to see and realise just how influential and powerfu women can be. With a slightly more civilised and diplomatic approach, confident in our decisions, but not cocky women are starting to make an impact, I would call it, “The Rise of the Female Boss”. Females in our day and age are really fortunate for all the hard work and effort our ancestors put in to fight for our human rights, our place and value in society. No longer are females viewed as women who go to college to get an education so they can meet the right man, they are actively encouraged to get an excellent education, be independent and fight for their rights to the life they want.

Have I been lucky?
As a child I was always encouraged to participate in everything – even though I was incredibly timid, I was a bit of a bossy boots (my brother would agree) and I wanted to partake in everything that he was doing, if he went to football camp, I wanted to go to football camp – but you are a girl? – “I don’t care that I am a girl, I want to go to football camp.” Thats how I remember is anyway. When I look back now I think, actually this is how I live my life. My friends all know this, if anybody says but you can’t do that you are not as strong us us because your a girl… I am the first to be like.. oh you wanna bet? Bring it! It’s the power of self belief! I recently had a conversation with someone who said, “you are not going to be able to change the world Jayne, maybe small parts of it, but not the world.” Then out of no where on facebook a little quote popped up, “Those who are crazy enough to think they can help change the world usually are the ones crazy enough to do it.” I thought – ah ha! SEE!

As females now, we have to realise there is no barrier to success, we need to start being as confident as men in our decisions and know that actually we are good enough and be influenced by those above us females and males, and learn! The key to success is learning, and mimicing – Take a person whom you see fit as astrong infleuntial role model for what you want to achieve in your life. If you studied that person, and viewed how they created there success and worked through how they created their success… you are highly likely to do it… but trust me its not an easy feat – it will take hard work and persistence just like it did the person before you! As an athlete, I worshipped Kasja Berqvist! She had one downfall, rose back up, another downfall, rose back up and I used to look at her and everytime I had a knockdown I was Like, “GET YOURSELF BACK UP!”

So today ladies (and gents), I want you to be rockstars! Believe in yourself, and if you don’t  then “fake it till you feel it! “When people assumed a high power pose (for example taking up space by spreading their limbs) for just two minutes their dominance hormone level went up and their stress levels went down. As a result they felt more powerful”. (Sandberg,s. 2015)
Scientific studies have been shown to prove that how you hold yourself and your posture can in 2 minutes changed your power status!!! How crazy is that!
So today in the words of Robin Sharma:
IMG_9671.JPG(Robin Sharma, The Greatness Guide)

Whatever you are doing today –
do it with confidence, wear your confidence with pride and be your best self!

If we are what we repeatedly do…

Poignont quote for the start of the week… who wants to be excellent this week? today? tomorrow? next week? 52 weeks time? It all starts with one simple choice… today I want to be excellent… tomorrow I want to be excellent… on Friday I want to be excellent…I am going to create a habit of being excellent!

Habits…. “a settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up.”

Good habits: I exercise daily, I eat well, I was excellent at work today, I tidied up the house, I made the bed, I showed gratitude for life, I helped make someones day…. many more…

Bad Habits: Reaction of anger to things out of your control, eating a take away on a week night rather than cooking fresh food, taking your gym stuff too work and then not actually going to the gym, picking up a chocolate bar at the garage rather than just leaving it…. many more…

What are both your good habits and bad habits? Have you even identified what contributes to a happy life for you or what habits make life more stressful and unhappy for you? And no before you say I am perfect… EVERYBODY in this world even the most perfect people will have something that they will say this is my bad habit… its a natural thing, we are human… but what is important is if you have identified a bad habit and want to change it… YOU CAN!

Habits are just a series of behaviours that you have repeatedly done time and time again, that your body and mind unconsiously would complete that habit… IE driving – once you have been driving for years, sometimes you can get in your car and not even remember how you got from a – b because you know exactly and your mind knows exactly what it is doing.  Same with exercise – athletes train day in day out, training for purpose and excellence, they make healthy choices to fuel their goals and work towards that daily.

I have people laugh as I still think like an athlete when it comes to my own training, because I never got out of the routine, because it a habit that I didn’t want to change.

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What habits do you want to start changing this week? What have you been putting off this year that you think, “NO – I want to erradicate this habit by the end of the year?”

START NOW! GET MOTIVATED – its this simple when you break it down!
It takes 30 days to create a habit… 60 days to consolidate that habit and 90 days for that habit to be a subconsious behaviour… that would mean by February you would of created a subconsious behaviour, meaning YOU would be absolutely smashing January with your goals and behaviours!

So how are we going to do this?

The 3 R’s of habit formation:

  • Create a Reminder
  • Get a Routine
  • Reward yourself for this habit

habit-three-r.jpg1: Reminder – Set an alert on your phone, put something up on your wall, JUST KEEP REMINDING YOURSELF what you want to change and why – Why will changing this habit have such a positive effect on your life.

2: Routine – creating that habit required routine -if that means practicing the habit at the same time daily, then that means practicing the habit at the same time daily.

3: Reward – What benefit will you gain from changing this habit? Remind yourself and reward yourself – if you are trying to eat chocolate don’t reward yourself with a chocolate bar! Think of simple rewards like allowing yourself to indulge in a bath, take some time out and watch the tele because you deserve it, think of things that make you happy for reward and do this.

A positive reward will make you want to repeat this habit so when your reminder pops up the next day you will repeat your routine and reward yourself. …. Sounds good?

So this week:

Be Excellent – Remember You are excellent – Go and practice Being Your Excellent Self

Continue reading “If we are what we repeatedly do…”

Its only You VS You

When you look into the mirror who do you see? What do you see? What do you want to see?

ianbarclayphotography-jaynenisbet-49-edit-21This is where you get answers that lighten the mood like Jennifer Anniston, or Brad Pitt… But in reality YOU are just amazing the way YOU are!

I wanted to write this blog to open up everyones minds to all thats going on in there, and how quickly simple habits can help bring you from self sabotage to self confidence and self motivation.

I’ll be honest with you all now everybody struggles with mindset and motivation- 3 months ago I wrote to Mind.org – A DESPERATE plea for help… I thought I had lost the plot, I was upset, frustrated at life, unhappy in myself, hated looking in the mirror, hated being in my own thoughts, embarassed by my life basically, felt useless, worthless, and pretty fed, and didn’t see or know – lost sight of why I was here on the planet. If I mentioned it to anyone, I felt like I was being weak. From the outside people don’t see an inner turmoil so I really like the phrase,  “be kind as you do not know what inner war is going on inside people.” I have ALWAYS struggled with confidence – because I haven’t addressed the issue enough. So here is a little bit of hope for anyone out there who is struggling to break through anxiety and confidence:

Everybody wants to know what their purpose is – otherwise well whats the point. For the first time in 6 years – I just didn’t know who I was. 1 year of health changing events being chucked at me every couple of months that challenged my mental strength, wore me down, and down and down…. till you hit rock bottom… and you take a moment and go wait a minute… THIS IS NOT WHAT MY LIFE IS MEANT TO BE. Now I am telling you…  literally being alone in my own thoughts – my mind would send me into a paranoia that literally meant I could only sleep 1.5 – 3 hours a night, in a space of thinking I was a bad person, that for some reason everyone in the world thought I was worthless… Then I thought… NO Jayne come on! GET YOUR ASSS INTO GEAR NOW! This self willowing, pitying yourself frame of mind gets you nowhere! So what did I do…

TOOK A BLOOMING Good look in the mirror and was like SERIOUSLY! COME ON!

I took a moment – mapped out what I wanted my life to be like, then questioned why is it not like that? Wrote down my answers and kept them safe.
I am now striving everyday to achieve that desired outcome! In a happy, positive manner and living my life for each day as it comes. You can do this too!

Created a vision board of how I imagined and wanted my life to be… and also recognised that if I ever wanted to find happiness in Love, life and career –  I TRUELY needed to be happy with myself… and I just wasn’t happy with me… so how am I meant to even attract in the right person, know what I want to do or be content in life if I wasn’t working on myself.

So step 1 – RESET my brain yet again – ALL aboard my incredible life coach Louise Lennon. Even us coaches need coaching – the reason I am telling you this is because I want each and every person out there who is struggling with some aspect of their life to know – it is okay – you are not alone – EVERYBODY is facing some form of mental dilemma and battle with their confidence, life or happiness.

Step 2: Implement strategies and coping mechanisms to stop anxiety and panic attacks. I would be out on a run and a thought would fly through my head and I would have an anxiety attack in the middle of nowhere… how did I channel this?
Positive Thoughts and Positive Self Talk. Starting an acceptance of myself and know where I am. Accept I wasn’t in a good place but things could only get better. SO….

Step 3: Work on developing yourself and developing your strength to cope. I literally started with reading 10 pages an evening of self development books (10 pages) that is all.. and each page of a book I started to relate more and more to it, and take more and more out of it… till the point I just thought wow seriously Jayne – you are not so messed up! Sign up to a course, join a fitness class, get moving, get your brain ticking! Trust me!

Step 4: Make time to improve yourself – wanna get your hair done – GET YOUR HAIR done, beauticians – DO IT, do whatever it takes to make you feel positive about your self, your image and your body.

Step 5: GET MORE SLEEP! I was a absolute NIGHTmare for getting sleep didn’t value it at all – living off 4 – 5 hours a night for almost a year! TRUST me it catches up with you. The difference in my skin, my hair, my nails, my body, my mind mostly and my outlook has improved dramatically..

5 small simple strategies for you turn your mindset away from being against you to working for you in your favour, all the time – all by small moments daily of deciding something wont affect you! Practice it – make it a habit – create a good positive habit!

BECOME YOUR BEST VERSION

In 3 months I have literally turned my life back on track, I am more motivated than EVER! IT is okay to have a dip in the road, it is a natural process of life, you need the lows to feel the highs, you need to create success – know what its like to be on the other end of the spectrum to appreciate it. BE GRATEful for EVERYthing you have!

Why not try creating a mind map of what you invisage your life to be like in 1 year, 5 years and 10 years. Look at the steps you might take to get there, think about important things of how does it make you feel imagining living your life like that?

Try it & Be kind To Yourself – You only have 1 amazing you 🙂

Vision Your Life – Create Your Happiness – Be Your Best Self  – BEAT Your DEMONS

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Managing Your Mind: Happiness

Happiness? What does that word mean to you?
Definition: “Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being defined by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy”

Happiness is something that many people state they are trying to find, I am searching for happiness, in life, in love, in work, but true happiness comes from within you learning to be completely and utterly happy with oneself and the truth is happiness is just so varied for everyone… so why do people judge each others lives so much?

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Jayne Nisbet: Ian Barclay Photography

If you were to take a moment to write down and describe what true happiness in your life looked like for you? What would it be? Who would be involved? Who would be removed? Whats stopping you take the step to achieve true happiness? Everybody deserves to be happy! This doesn’t mean you need to running around the world sharing peace and happiness everywhere… this is the feeling of content happiness within… because lets face it… content happiness with yourself is where you find happiness in your life.

People say to me, “Jayne you have always got so much energy”, “you are always so energetic”, “how come you can stay so positive when things aren’t going your way?”

BECAUSE… We control every action of our brain: we control how we react to situations – if you want to be annoyed or frustrated with someone, fact is you are the only one who is allowing it to happen.

Take a moment

Scenario: You have had an extremely stressful day at work, and you are driving home and you are just feeling a bit het up that your day has not gone quite as planned and you get stuck in traffic.

How do you react? Is it an instant melt down moment – the world is going to end – beeping your horn – ranting and raving.

How does this make you feel? Angry – even more het up – hot – flustered – frustrated (basically you just feel rubbish in yourself)

What if you got to this traffic and thought well this is annoying but there is nothing I can do and in that moment spend some time reflecting on your day. Why was it so stressful? what could you do to make your day better tomorrow? Then on self reflection realise that it hasn’t been too bad, and the traffic is now moving again and everything is going to be okay.

How does this make you feel? More relaxed, relieved, actually remembering the world isn’t going to end because of stress!

This is just an example of your mindset in a moment but in each given moment in your day you are given the opportunity to weather you smile or you frown, the same way you have the control to stop a thought or allow a thought to consume your mind and brain.

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It has even been proven scientifically that smiling can increase instant happiness, “When our brains feel happy, endorphins are produced and neuronal signals are transmitted to your facial muscles to trigger a smile. This is the start of the positive feedback loop of happiness. When our smiling muscles contract, they fire a signal back to the brain, stimulating our reward system, and further increasing our level of happy hormones, or endorphins. In short, when our brain feels happy, we smile; when we smile, our brain feels happier.” (British Council of Science)

So answer this again:

Happiness? What does this word mean to you?

Why wouldn’t you work on your happiness? Why wouldn’t you stop negative thoughts from entering? Why wouldn’t you want to live your life as your true self and express yourself in whatever way you want!

Write down what makes you happy and make sure that you do more of what makes you happy? Why not? Just try…. Go on I Dare you!

You never know how it might change the world you live in 🙂

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Love yourself daily and remind yourself that you are amazing – because each and every single one of you out there has something to give to the world. Go and shine your happiness and help others achieve theirs.

Smile and The World Will Smile with You x